FreeFreeDescription
Translation in English
📖____She was a young girl of about twelve years old, dressed in an Ankara blouse and a material wrapper.
She was walking along, singing, with a giant horsewhip in her hand. Spotting someone selling sugarcane, she ran over to him. Upon seeing her, he flashed his reddish teeth and asked, "LADIDI, where did you come from like this?" She grabbed fifty-naira worth of sugarcane and replied, "From home, of course."
Seeing that LADIDI had almost finished chewing her sugarcane and was about to reach for another, he widened his eyes at her and said, "Are you out of your mind? You took fifty naira worth of sugarcane without me saying anything, and now you're going to take another one?" LADIDI, who was busy chewing the sugarcane with drool pooling in her mouth, replied, "Swear by Allah, either you give me more sugarcane or I'll beat you up right now."
The sugarcane seller, who was at least old enough to be her father, looked at her and said, "Little girl, go on your way and mind your business." LADIDI just kept twirling her whip while laughing and looking at him.
The sugarcane seller said, "Little girl, I am leaving. Pray for me to make good sales today." LADIDI looked at the sugarcane seller and said, "Don't worry."
Just as the sugarcane seller turned to pull his cart away, he felt the heavy landing of a whip. He knelt down, crying out and scratching himself. When he turned around, neither LADIDI nor her shadow was anywhere to be found.
She ran all the way until she reached their house—a modest compound surrounded by a fence made of cornstalk stalks. YADIKKO was winnowing guinea corn. Without even greeting her, Ladidi dashed straight into the room where she slept and locked the door. YADIKKO was left speechless, shaking her head and raising her hands in prayer, begging Allah to guide Ladidi.
She brought out her toys and headed straight for the baobab tree that dominated the center of the courtyard. While YADIKKO was washing the guinea corn she had winnowed, she looked at Ladidi and said, "Didn't I tell you to stop going to that tree?"
Ladidi pouted, muttering under her breath. YADIKKO held her chin in frustration and muttered, "Could she have brought home genies, seeing how obsessed she is with hanging out at the base of the baobab tree?" Ladidi completely ignored YADIKKO and went back to playing.
YADIKKO kept calling out to Ladidi's name. Ladidi approached, stamping her feet. YADIKKO handed a ten-naira note to LADIDI and said, "Take this guinea corn to Shafi'u's grinding mill and tell him to grind it for you right now."
She picked up her veil, tied it around her waist like a sash, and hoisted the basin of corn onto her head.
Along the way, she bumped into a meat pie/awara seller. She set the basin down and called out to him. The moment the boy realized it was LADIDI calling him, he tried to run away, but she grabbed him and barked, "Where are you going, you son of your mother? Do you know me?"
The boy knelt down and pleaded, "LADIDI, please forgive me." She made a hawk-like gesture and asked, "How much is the awara?"
"Two for five naira," the boy replied, terrified. Ladidi lumped four pieces together in one spot and told the boy, "I've eaten two," then scooped up another four and said, "I've eaten my money's worth, the rest is on credit." The boy rolled his eyes and said, "Wallahi, LADIDI, my Goggo will scold me." LADIDI slapped him across the mouth and snatched two more pieces.
By the time the boy had fled a safe distance, he yelled back, "LADIDI, may God judge you!" LADIDI scoffed, knowing that at least she had managed to eat thirty naira worth of awara for free.
She picked up her grinding basin and arrived at Shafi'u's grinding mill, announcing, "I've brought corn to grind." Shafi'u, who was busy operating the mill, completely ignored her. She spoke again, but he still refused to acknowledge her. She spotted a couple of chigger/tick bugs near one of his feet; she picked one up and dropped it inside his shoe, picked up another and tucked it into the side of his shirt, and slipped the remaining one into a tear she spotted on his shirt. Then she stepped back and resumed her singing.
Shafi'u suddenly felt a bite on his foot and reached down to scratch it, then felt another bite on his head and reached up to scratch his head, then felt it on his body. The ticks had crawled all the way inside his trousers! He bolted out of the grinding room, screaming at the top of his lungs. LADIDI couldn't stop laughing. Shafi'u ran toward their house, accidentally stepping right into the middle of an active outdoor cooking hearth. He collapsed, rolling on the ground, frantically scratching himself everywhere—no one could figure out what was wrong with him, as he kept scratching here and there. As for LADIDI, the moment Shafi'u fled, she took over the grinding mill since she knew how to operate it. Once she finished grinding, she hoisted the basin onto her head and walked away, laughing and saying, "I've saved YADIKKO's ten naira, and I got my grinding done for free!"
As she walked along, she ran into a boiled yam vendor. She cornered him, set down her basin of corn, and asked, "Yam vendor, is there any on credit?" The yam vendor shot her an ugly glare and snapped, "Your mother's son, what credit are you talking about?" LADIDI widened her eyes and shouted, "Did you just insult my mother?" The yam vendor retorted, "What can you possibly do? Look at you shaped like a sack of fertilizer!"
Before he knew what hit him, LADIDI knocked over his display tray of yams, scooped up whatever she could grab, and dashed away. The yam vendor grabbed her, but she threw him to the ground, climbed right on top of his stomach, and unleashed a heavy beatdown on him without mercy.
After begging for mercy, she finally pulled herself off him and said, "Didn't you see I'm just a little girl? Yet you wanted to eat my mother's honor for nothing?" The yam vendor hastily handed LADIDI a twenty-naira note and bolted away in a hurry.
She continued her journey until she reached home. YADIKKO scolded, "LADIDI, you never listen to my warnings!"
She set down the ground corn and said, "YADIKKO, I want to drink water."
YADIKKO, who was busy sorting peanuts, said, "Wallahi, whoever marries you is in deep trouble!" LADIDI, as if pricked by a needle, jerked up and bolted outside.
Hearing the sound of a car, she headed toward the vehicle. One of the men inside looked at LADIDI and asked, "Handmaiden of God, we are asking for directions." She twisted her face in disgust and snapped, "I don't like being questioned like that. If you want to talk, speak properly!" One of the men inside the car said, "Please forgive us, young lady, we are actually looking for Malam Adamu."
She clicked her tongue and said, "I know the house, but only if you let me ride inside this dust-bin of a car."
Another man in the car, who had remained silent while the other spoke, leaned through the car window and barked, "Whose mother did you just call a dust-bin?!"
She twisted her face at him again and said, "Don't you dare insult me back!" The man next to him said, "Humaid, let's just coax her so she can guide us."
Humaid pushed open the car door for her. The moment she stepped inside, a terrible odor filled the car, smelling like someone had just passed gas. Jalal exclaimed, "Humaid, didn't you smell that weird odor?" Just as the stench hit Humaid's nose, they couldn't figure out where it was coming from. LADIDI glared at them and said, "Why are you two holding your noses like a couple of school teachers?"
With a look of disgust, Humaid said, "Wallahi, she is the source of this smell, even her mouth smells!" Realizing they were talking about her, LADIDI pulled out a sewing needle, looked over to see Humaid had stopped looking at her, smiled, swept her hand sideways, and plunged the needle right into Humaid! Humaid let out an unbroken shriek of pain. Jalal parked the car and rushed over to Humaid, who was wailing endlessly. LADIDI looked at him and asked, "What's wrong with you, Mr. Fashionista?"
None of them bothered to answer her or even look her way. Humaid cried out, "Drive the car, Jalal, let's hurry and get to the house."
When they arrived right in front of the house, LADIDI announced, "Okay, we've arrived, get out." Humaid, nursing his hurting leg, muttered, "Well, you should go back since you just walked us here." She widened her eyes and thought to herself: This guy clearly doesn't know who LADIDI is.
LADIDI glanced at Humaid's leg and burst into laughter. Since Humaid couldn't run, he hurled curses at her. Jalal intervened, "Since she showed us the house, let's go and leave the girl alone."
She spotted a giant stick, picked it up, adjusted her expression, and waited until Humaid stepped right near the entrance of the house. She jammed the stick into the exact leg where she had poked him with the needle! He collapsed to the ground, screaming, while she ran away...
Malam Adamu heard the agonizing scream of a grown man and rushed out quickly. Jalal greeted, "Peace be upon you, Malam." Malam Adamu replied, "Ah, who do I see looking like city people?"
Jalal explained, "Malam, it's us. A young girl guided us to your house, and then she struck Humaid in the leg with a stick and ran off." Malam Adamu sighed and said, "I know this couldn't be anyone else except LADIDI. This is typical of her work."
Humaid mustered the strength to say, "Jalal, go call this girl's mother, let me show her who her parents are."
Malam Adamu advised, "Wallahi, you better let it go, because this girl is rumored to possess genies..."
(The narrative dives into the background of Malam Musa, Ladidi's father, and their connection to Malam Adamu and Humaid/Jalal's family origin in Jos, detailing how Alhaji Abdullahi—Humaid's father—rose from humble beginnings to immense wealth).
(Returning to the story line): Bafula Tani poured a container of red water (dirty wash water) all over her body. She opened her eyes wide and asked, "Does a person who dies come back to life?" Bafula Tani glared at her and replied, "Since you see you're back, no!"
She began plotting her revenge against Bafula Tani. Grabbing the very stick he had beaten her with, she bolted away.
Since Bafula Tani didn't know where Ladidi lived, a young boy happened to pass by. He called out to him and asked, "Do you know Ladidi's house?" The boy nodded and said, "It's not far." Bafula Tani pleaded, "Please accompany me there."
Leaving his cattle behind, they headed to Ladidi's house. The boy slipped inside the compound and found her sweeping. He greeted her and said someone was outside asking for Ladidi. YADIKKO, happy that her girl was finally receiving visitors for courtship chats, said, "Tell him she's coming out right now."
The boy went back and told Bafula Tani she was on her way. Ladidi stepped out of YADIKKO's room decked out in makeup—if you saw her, you'd think she was a fresh-out-of-the-underworld genie! She flashed her teeth and asked, "YADIKKO, do I look beautiful?" YADIKKO nodded and began calling her praise names.
She peeked out to see who the visitor was and spotted him clenching his fists like someone ready to throw punches. Hearing him mutter, "Wallahi the moment she steps out, I'm going to punch her," Ladidi immediately retreated back into the house.
YADIKKO asked, "Are you back already?"
"No," Ladidi replied, slipping into her small room. She grabbed Bafula Tani's own stick, snuck back out, and hid right near where he was sitting. The moment he turned his back, she hoisted the stick and brought it down hard on him! He crashed straight to the ground. Ladidi marched past him, leaving him and his stick behind while he lay there paralyzed and wailing in pain.
As she continued walking, she ran into two young men. The moment she saw them, she recognized them as Humaid and Jalal, who had just stepped out of the perimeter...
Episode: 5 & 6
Humaid was dressed in a pristine white shadda outfit, while Jalal wore casual clothes. Ladidi gasped, running into a nearby shop and shouting, "Please, palm oil, pour some on my hands!" The palm oil vendor glared at her and demanded, "Are you out of your mind?" LADIDI shot him a look and said, "You'll see what sane people do!" Spotting an empty container outside, she ran out and grabbed it. Before the vendor realized what was happening, she plunged the container straight into a drum of palm oil!
Seeing the mess LADIDI had made, the vendor jumped up and rushed toward her with the intent to slap her. As he raised his hand to strike her, someone splashed a handful of palm oil right across his face! He dropped his hand and scrambled to find a seat to wipe himself off. LADIDI, seeing this, scooped up more palm oil and continued on her way.
She spotted Humaid and Jalal resting under the shade of a mango tree. Walking stealthily, she crept up behind them where they couldn't see her, hidden behind the massive tree trunk. She poured the palm oil down the back of Humaid's shirt while they chatted, completely oblivious. She set the empty container aside.
Spotting several ticks, she grabbed two and placed them right on Humaid's seating spot, and grabbed two more to place right where Jalal was sitting. Then she walked over to a nearby shop selling children's toys. Suddenly, shouting filled the air—she looked back and saw Humaid jumping up and down, and Jalal doing the exact same thing! In short, neither could help the other. Having no idea what to do, they both took off running like absolute lunatics!
Jalal yelled, "Humaid, wallahi your back is covered in palm oil!" Humaid widened his eyes and snapped, "Leave me alone, palm oil is the least of my problems right now!"
Onlookers stared at them in utter confusion. LADIDI cleared out of the area so they wouldn't spot her. With great difficulty, Humaid and Jalal managed to find their way back to Malam Adamu's house since it was only their second time there. They dashed inside the compound. Inna Hauwa, hearing the commotion, didn't even stop to check who it was—she panicked and sprinted into her own room as well.
Humaid and Jalal locked themselves in the room Malam had assigned to them, both wailing in agony until the itching finally subsided a long while later. Humaid began gathering their clothes into a pile. Jalal asked, "Humaid, what are you doing with these clothes?" Humaid glared at Jalal and replied, "Insha Allah, tomorrow we are leaving this village." Remembering the mad dash they had just made, Jalal burst into laughter.
Meanwhile, Ladidi came out carrying a tray of tuwo and soup. Malam Adamu and Malam Musa were sitting outside chatting. Eavesdropping, she heard them saying that the guests would be leaving tomorrow. Ladidi did a little celebratory jump and ran over to her toys near the baobab tree. She headed to YADIKKO's room and found her performing Ishaa prayers. She grabbed the room lamp and returned to her toy stash.
She picked up some white chalk, went to a grinding stone, and crushed it until it became fine powder. Packing it into a nylon bag, she went to her room and looked into the mirror. She scooped up a generous amount of body pomade, smeared it all over her face, and then caked the white chalk powder all over her face. Remembering she needed eyeliner, she grabbed her kajal pencil, drew thick black lines across her mouth, and scribbled dark markings all over her face. She pulled out her most tattered clothes—a blouse with torn sleeves and an Ankara wrapper ripped right at the knees. She tied a tiny, ragged headscarf around her head.
Anyone who laid eyes on Ladidi would instantly mistake her for a wild forest genie, as she was completely unrecognizable.
YADIKKO kept calling out her name, but she heard her loud and clear and completely ignored her. Peeking toward the front gate, she saw her father and Malam Adamu standing outside; it looked like her father was about to enter the house while Malam Adamu was heading to the mosque for the night.
She tossed her stick ahead of her and scaled the compound wall. As she started walking along, she hadn't run into a single soul, but just as she neared Malam Adamu's house, she bumped into someone...
Summary
The narrative follows Ladidi, a fiercely mischievous, chaotic, and supernatural-acting twelve-year-old village girl living with her grandmother, Yadikko, while her father, Malam Musa, maintains a close friendship with Malam Adamu.
The story contrasts Ladidi's wildly unpredictable, prank-filled escapades in her rural community with the arrival of urban visitors from Jos: Humaid, Jalal, and their interactions with the village. Humaid, accustomed to city life, repeatedly crosses paths with Ladidi, resulting in disastrous and hilarious consequences—from getting pricked with sewing needles and infested with ticks to being drenched in palm oil and attacked with sticks. Meanwhile, subplots reveal the background of Humaid's family wealth, tracing back to his grandfather and father (Alhaji Abdullahi) in Jos. The chapter culminates in Humaid and Jalal vowing to flee the village out of sheer terror of Ladidi, while Ladidi disguises herself like a terrifying bush-genie to unleash yet another wave of nighttime chaos.
Description
This excerpt is a vibrant, fast-paced rural comedy rooted in Nigerian folklore and village satire. It blends elements of slapstick humor, folkloric superstition (rumors of Ladidi being possessed by genies), and domestic slice-of-life realism. Through the chaotic exploits of Ladidi—a classic "menace-child" archetype who rules her village through sheer audacity, pranks, and physical intimidation—the text paints a colorful picture of generational clash between traditional village life and modern urban visitors. The vivid descriptions of local markets, grinding mills, traditional attire, and the sharp behavioral contrasts between the traumatized city boys and the utterly fearless rural girl create a uniquely entertaining and culturally rich reading experience.
